I didn’t blog last night because I got home late. I’d gone out with Amy and Heather, to celebrate Amy’s birthday. We went to dinner, then to Borders bookstore. We usually go to the fabulous independently owned local bookstore, Tattered Cover. But that’s downtown, and Heather didn’t want to stay out too late, so we opted for the McBookstore down the street.
We laughed and ate too much and I for one bought too many books. And if I had sat down and blogged instead of diving into one of the books I bought (didn’t come up for air until I finished it at 2:30 a.m.), this is what I would have said.
Friends like Heather and Amy are a gift. I truly believe only women can understand this dynamic. When I am with friends like these, I find my voice. They listen, and because they know so much of my stuff, they hear things beyond what I’m saying. They knew, for instance, why I hated our waiter on sight, and they called me on it. I didn’t even realize why until they said it (then it was obvious, and anyone who knows my history already knows why. Not that deep, but I can be dense).
When I am there, with friends like these, I find myself expressing thoughts I only dimly knew I had. It’s like a free write, following the current of conversation, only to discover yourself somewhere you never expected. Light bulb moments.
If I sound self-absorbed in describing what my friends give me, it’s only because I don’t want to speak for them. But I believe the process is reciprocal. We come together to form more than we are apart. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
So since last night I’ve been contemplating the great gift of women friends I’ve been given. There’s Amy and Heather, and the whole of women’s group at church, members past and present. Kim from college. Mom. Women who have stood with me, strengthened me. Made me laugh.
We rock.